Attachment styles stem from childhood experiences and relationships. These learned ways of relating color all adult relationships, which often leads to problematic relationship dynamics. Couples Counseling and individual therapy heal the primary attachment wounds and help cultivate more effective communication in loving and equitable intimate relationships.
Couples tend to get into cyclical problematic dynamics of withdrawing and shutting down, or escalating and arguing. Often one partner pursues the other (wanting connection but not knowing how to achieve it) while the other one retreats, feeling overwhelmed and shut down. This cycle is very typical in problematic relationships and is what Dr. Sue Johnson refers to as the distancer and pursuer dance. Read more about this common relationship pitfall.